i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
I want to be a jewelry store heckler. "Hey man, is she really worth it"
I hope God doesn't listen to everybody on a Saturday night.
Julian told me all the fish in his pond died and he didn't know when or how. I didn't have the heart to tell him he drunkenly peed in the pond on Saturday as everyone cheered him on.
She said she was an education major and you replied with "oh I'm taking a semester off too". And we never saw her again...
Covered in gravy. Never pour gravy while drinking.
Our fuck buddy relationship took a turn for the worst after we were drunk and I punched him in the face when he asked for a three some with my best friend.
I have nothing to say for myself. When 2chainz comes on at the bar all bets are off.
My brother didnt wanna sleep with her because she was my friend. Did I miss the memo where we're not supposed to be fucking each others friends? Oh well too late.
Definitely a Xanax and Jell-O shots kinda day...except my Jell-O shots are really just a big bowl of a Jell-O shot that I use a spoon to eat.
it's not like I want to die, I just want life to stop for a little bit. how does that work?
You knew you'd end up at his house the minute you emptied the bowl of condoms into your purse.
Like don't initiate a threesome when we're all watching SPONGEBOB. That's like sacrilege.
My desperation for dick was off put by his anime figure collection.
She was blacked out at her own party. It felt good to stand next to her while she laid on the floor and say "vomit does not look good on you."
Randomize
