I just got peed on. This karma circle is starting to get vicious.
He was crying because he hiccuped every time he kissed me. We then crawled to the kitchen because neither of us could stand, and I spoon-fed him peanut butter "to cure his ailment."
I'm two guys short from fucking the whole baseball team and one is gay. I will be successful by the end of this month.
Dick sucking on arrival? or would you like to cash that in later?
I just stood still on a stair at the train station expecting it to go down automatically like an escalator... Today's going to be a good day
And that was the night we had mind-blowing sex with the score from Raiders of the Lost Ark blaring on vinyl in the background...
We had sex on the playground and then walked around his neighborhood grading houses based on their Christmas decorations
My greatest accomplishment today was eating a box of Thai food the size of a toddler.
Dude I bought a 300 dollar buffalo painting. I'm no longer allowed to take shrooms.
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
I do not love him. There is no love. Only sex and meatloaf.
Why do I know about what dicks have been in your mouth but didn't know you had a dog? What kind of friends are we??
Awake! can you bring me my pants...im under the couch
Well I'm trying out this whole "not sleep with a stranger thing"
That's silly... just silly. And by silly I mean unrealistic.
Apparently last night I was doing back bends for the guy making my easy mac because clearly it wasn't easy enough for me.
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