She said her name was "party"
Sometimes I wish there were a little bird hiding that would periodically go, "creep-per."
Nothing quite says America like barbecue and beer at 9 in the morning.
i dont think duct tape can fix my g spot
lets call myth busters
She just stuck her hand down the strippers pants. Shit just got real.
I got a dollar bill stuffed into my bra on two separate occasions by two separate guys simply for having boobs. I feel like somewhere god is patting himself on te back while pointing at me goin "you're welcome dude." easiest two bucks I ever made.
Can you come get Dustin he's putting taco bell fire sauce on cigarettes trying to light them again.
Well, I woke up on a roll-away, with a knot in the back of my head and penis confetti stuck to me. Also, I apparently literally gave the shirt off my back right before I passed out, so I was topless. Vegas won this trip.
we panicked because we couldn't find you anywhere, but then we found you tripping in the bathtub with Marie's cat. there was no water. you thought there was water, though.
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I just tried to snap you a picture of the CVS where we decided not to become parents.
I just put a pill up my vagina. It was little like a quail egg. There is so much happening up there right now.
In California. Through an entire game + OT. That’s a long time to have an octopus in your pants.
we had to take 10 shots sometime before midnight, then 11 shots between midnight and 1. so yes its gonna be a rough day.
I once left mine in my bra and I forgot and I didn't notice it was there until it vibrated.
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