just woke up and he was jacking off in the corner.. am i being punked?
Michael Jackson had a heart attack when he found out boyz to men was a music group not a delivery service.
You answered the door when the cops arrived with a beer in one hand and a pillowcase over your head yelling "GAGA, OOH LA LA!"
Dude dan is so baked he taped his remote to the futon so he couldn't lose it again. Come over here
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
idk whats worse playing power hour to yourself, or the fact that you were having fun while doing it
he proceeded to grab my vagina through my leggings in the middle of the dance floor. strangely enough I was okay with it
U handed him a box of flavored condoms, winked, and slurred, "grape juice is her favorite."
BAHHAHHAHHAHAHHA SOME ASS IS BIYING NE DRHBKS. DRUBK
I think the tooth fairy visited me last night... after I chipped my tooth n blacked out, I woke up to my purse filled with cocaine n sequins.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
HOLY FUCK COMFIEST CHAIR EVER
If you put those two in a room together it'd be like a Taylor Swift fantasy and an Adele nightmare just licking faces
Novelty of the week: Getting my lipstick back in an evidence bag
Nope. Turns put my desperate group message for sex didn't work out.
Well you sent it to two guys who were roommates.
They could have rock paper scissored for it. My vagina = the prize.
Doing blow in the bathroom isnt the same without you
Do a rail off the baby station in my honor
Listen all I know is that mistakes were made and she stole the car and drove half an hour for food at 4 am
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