Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
he was so hot that i framed the used condom. it's not trash, it's art.
We just picked up about 540 lbs of women....
they're scary. like turkeys that ate nuclear fucking steroids.
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
I hope that he knows just because i pissed in his bed doesn't mean were together.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
it's like getting dryhumped by a chainsaw in the very best possible way
OMG THE KID WHO TRIED TO MAKE OUT AT THE BAR WITH ME IS SITTIG NEXT TO ME IN THE AIRPORT. WHY LIFE WHY???
On a side note...my DUI lawyer just snapchatted me. This is the exact moment in time when I realized my like IS a joke.
You're breaking my sexual little heart
Really this has to stop, if they get any younger we will be breaking the law
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
"Uno más" are officially my least favorite words in the entire Spanish language.
Just try and act like you're sober
I can't I snorted an anti depressant and he's pouring me tequila shots
Randomize
