Bea Arthur died! :(
What?
Big bird passed.
She's hot, in a Megan Fox with Down's Syndrome kinda way. Like, she'd win Miss Deliverance Pageant
At least she's the hottest one. Oh well, it's all about stats
Is there a nice way of saying 'touch my penis or i dont really wanna hangout"?
Its like after 6 beers, the clap doesn't scare me anymore.
I'm just glad you're the only person I can have a "remember when we thought I was pregnant" conversation with.
Valentines day isn't about being a couple in love..... It's about chocolate and faking orgasms.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
Drink a bottle I wine by yourself? Treat yo self
They are stoned and trying to learn sign language together. It's like watching a chimp waving at itself in a mirror.
I've gotten 2 singers numbers, a 6'5 dude has promised to take me to Oktoberfest, and I spent the night w a pilot named Zeus who looks like caramel tastes. Also I sprained my thumb punching some guy I named 'hater'. I love Nashville
You can't just say you're dying of terminal cancer everytime they try to card you
He caught a Pokemon on my head while I sucked him off. I think I need to marry him.
No, I didn't meet up with him! That's when I had chlamydia.
Micheal let me call him captain america while we fucked. It was awesome
You don't make any sense
TEQUILA
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