Is it necrophilia if we're both dead?
It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
Dude she has a fucking rock collection. Never will I ever talk to her again.
Was just explained ingredients in a four loko. Puzzles of the universe starting to piece together.
Does anyone know who that girl who fell backwards and broke the shoe rack with her head was?
Dude you couldnt even talk, you just kept hiccuping and slamming your head on the wall.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I DON'T WANT TO KNOW THE SCIENTIFIC REASONING BEHIND WHY I STARTED A HAREM ESPECIALLY NOT FROM A GUY IN THE HAREM!
I swear the toilet was so cold I tried to stand up but my balls wer frozen to it. most awkward five minutes between me and my mom.
My VP dropped me off at the Strip Club in Houston. Just said "I was never here".
I just masterbated to the home shopping channel...what have I become...
I took multi-tasking to a new level. I just ate a plate of nachos off my lap while driving to the bar. And I barely got any on me.
He tried to do a JoJo pose and wound up breaking his wrist in the process. Truly a story for the ages.
Laying in bed naked is fun. I now see why guys love boobs... They're sooo bouncy! This long distance relationship is really killing my sex life.
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