So I just found panties on our kitchen floor that had a slit in the vagina section. Does that mean shes open for sex, or she has a penis?
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
there's a wrestler here in a Ferrari//puma hoodie who is telling girls his win//loss record as a pickup line.
I really wish I didn't have to wear pants this is ridiculous
Well that wasnt the exboyfriend i expected to hook up with today
He's got a pretty small dick but he's a total sweetheart. I'm gonna buy a new dildo and just deal with it.
He threw up in a cup in the limo and when he got out the bouncer told him he couldn't bring drinks in so he gave the glass to that dumb girl we brought with us from c street.
I know, she tried to drink it
I feel awful
Physically or morally
Physically. The only immoral thing I did was steal money from strippers while they gave me lapdances.
I take pleasure in knowing how many gallons of booze we've put away in comradery.
I think we should measure in "bathtubs"
I don't know. Something about answering "what did you do on Sunday?" Seems odd when the reply is, painted, went to the grocery store, put a restraint device on my bed.
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
We can stop fighting if you send me a picture of your dick standing at full attention wearing a sock.
I'll wait.
It can also be a hat.
We watched Purple Rain and then proceeded to have sex while listening to the album. If that's not exactly how Prince would want people to honor him, I don't know what is
just saw the most amazing side boob. i wanted to hold it.
Randomize