Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
My mom is pretending to be Paula Deen while making breakfast...I'm pretty sure she's sober.
I don't know what you're talking about but its dick galore in the tub. We will be getting poked tonight. Bring forks.
I have now added draft and wells specials that different bars have to my blackberry calendar.. Help me.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
No, listening to the fray and drinking a bottle of jack daniels does not count as counseling
We wore fake mustaches and shirts that said team mustache ride to a party we weren't even invited to
I swear she looks like a sloth.... I'll toss a coin...
Can you check on Mike in the bathroom. It's been like 20 min.
He's fine. He's just standing at the trash can in line for another beer from the keg. Nbd.
State dependent memory. I just needed to feel my teeth. It was like a fog was lifted.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I was just wicked nice to a telemarketer... that's how stoned this woman got me.
well I got an eye infection from a stripper motorboating me but overall it was a great weekend
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
Only thing that feels right is being horizontal in the fetal position
MUFFINS DON'T MAKE YOU ORGASM MULTIPLE TIMES OR HAVE ROCK HARD MUSCLES.
I was so high I just stared at the papa john's app on my phone and cried
Randomize
