It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
she definitely has that "I'll bang you, but then I'll tell your girlfriend" look to her.
I guess I fist pumped too hard. I hit my mom in the face and now we're sitting in the ER.
When we told the nurse what happened, she replied with "OH, Well you don't look Italian to me!"
True. She actually gives a fuck. A quality looked down upon if she wants to be one of us
Fuck him. I'll set him on fire for you. Then we'll see how good of a firefighter he is.
Well there's nothing more unattractive them a naked, soft man crying
Oh good your over him
You're right. Single life welcomed me back with open arms. It's like it knew it wasnt going to be long when I left.
No, your dick is problems. Anyone you fuck haunts us for the rest of the semester. If you need to get laid, I'll personally drive you out of state.
We are gunna have the best winter break smoking weed and eating ham
All I remember is laying in that secret hideaway closet, naked, with a beer cowboy hat on and you walking in and sitting down crying because no one would have sex with you
I jammed my finger giving him a hand job. Don't ask how, I'm still trying to figure that out.
How do you keep manipulating these men into helping you?
I'm a massage therapist with an oral fixation. It's not nearly as hard as you make it out to be.
I'm gonna have to shit in a bar again tonight
If you don't come home and fuck me soon I'm walking over there naked and dragging you home by your penis
She picked a quarter off the floor, kissed it "for luck" and won the $20,000 jackpot. She bought dinner and stayed sober to drive us home. This is a typical example of a visit with my sister.
Randomize
