Kelly, is this rhetorical, or sarcastic? You are very kind & quite beautiful, but we never really evolved into anything & your prevailing ambivalence spoke more than words ever could.
"We" really do not exist-if we ever did. Both of us may have been hoping for more than was possible.
I would enjoy sitting down to talk about the dissolution, but think it may end up being counter productive.
Don't make out with my wife yet
the cashier wished me a happy fathers day while i bought condoms
Skanksgiving break is awesome already... pilgrim and indian roleplay tonight.
just woke up in my neighbors garage.
scratch that. I'm like 6 miles from my house in a random garage.
I bought a dress specifically for face plant durability... this is how serious I am about my drunk status this weekend
some drunk bitch driving a golf cart ran over the live band... its bad.
I was talking to a guy at my work, and mid-sentence he started vomiting violently for about five minutes, then he said, " great dope" and carried on like nothing had happened.
We got security called on us. Apparently the wedding down the street didn't appreciate the trespassing or our loud as fuck rendition of We Are Young.
The Supreme Court upheld health insurance. If that's not an excuse to get hospital drunk, I don't know what is.
I got so drunk last night that I drunk texted myself. "hand jobs are the currency of the future"
But if I live with you I'll help pay rent. Only if you promise no 50 shades of what the fuck internet hookups
FYI my mom is sending thanksgiving "samples" of her fancy pot stash for us this weekend. I bring the BEST family leftovers.
so hungover. idk whos house or comp im on
I'm covered in jizz and the toll booth lady knew it
Randomize
