Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
i think blowjobs on the first date are perfectly acceptable. as long as you dont go dick to mouth.
And then falling down drunk the next morning, concussing yourself and splitting your head open?
That was pretty sad, but you more than made up for it by using "concussing" in a sentence
i'm surrounded by gay midgets. not sure if i'm bragging or asking you to come rescue me. wait for follow up.
17 Inappropriate Things People Did With Instruments
I would pay so much money for a video of you fucking a sheep
Please dont jizz on my ds screen.
I feel like vodka or no vodka, you'd still be trying to button your cat into your comforter
I think my vagina was keeping me fat all these years out of self preservation. It's like she knew what would happen if I lost the weight.
Pitchers of shots should be outlawed. I've puked more than i've breathed in the past half hour.
21 People Reveal The Most Embarrassing Secrets They Know About Someone
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
So he says to my dad "I'll pull out of your daughter but I'm not going to apologize". Yea, my night was fun.
I have 7 papers to write and I already bought gas station ice cream in my pjs and questioned whether or not a beer float was a thing.
TIL a potato cannon can be loaded with dildos as ammunition. Boy, do our neighbours love us!
So we are in the middle of sex and his brother knocks on the door and says "dude I just wanted to know if you want to see the fish I got tonight"
I made it 1 week... 5 business days at my new job before sleeping with my coworker.