We've been friends for six months, when do my benefits kick in?
While in Europe, he bought me a pouring tap to put on my liquor so I don't spill. This means 2 things.1) He really loves me. 2) I'm a noticeable alcoholic.
Home remedy for the herp. Black tea. I need to strap teabags to my wang.
I swear every time I make the effort to make my hair look nice, someone jizzes in it.
Romer got arrested for getting in a bar fight with a bus boy because he was trying to steal a keg, had it all the way to the car
I can't begin to describe what I look like walking through the grocery store with this outfit and chocolate syrup.
I think he finally resigned to the fact he could not get off. He just looked at me and said "I'm having testicle difficulties," rolled over and passed out.
Sometimes familiar penis is best. Its like comfort food for your vagina.
I just walked in on my sixteen year old sister soaking her tampon in vodka. I go to Berkeley. And they think she's the good daughter.
I think your dad took our porno
I don't know which I need first...a shower or a confessional.
Just walked out of the train bathroom after having sex and got a round of applause from the passengers. Definitely the best part of the trip.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
I threw up outside. Then I peed got off the toilet and threw up. While I threw up u pulled up my pants. Not my best moment
Although, she is an extremely cool person. She put the "buddy" in "fuck buddy." And I mean that in the most respectful way possible.
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