i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
cant go down on her man, her vagoo reminds me of a face hugger from aliens
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
At the miami airport. Don't know if it's all the tequila I drank in cozumel or the 5 year olds french accent but I might puke.
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
just thought you should know it took me an hour and a half to make soup. I had to keep laying on my kitchen floor. being 21 is hard.
I wish I was in the big bed with a naked you post sex eating chicken nuggets
Drinking Fireball means never having to say you're sorry. Unless its at you're arraignment.
Winning pick four numbers were just 6969... if I were 18 I could've won 20,000 dollars.
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
WHAT GOOD IS APPRECIATING IF NOBODY'S NAKED
Give me a second. I'm doing my best but I'm drunk so for some reason fitting both my boobs in the pic is just incredibly difficult. They aren't THAT big. I'm just being retarded.
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Oh man I wish I could've gotten a picture of how many anti-circumcision stickers are on this Prius
We never leave a bad bitch behind. its a party foul..we'll find you somehow
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