I had a good time, probably would have a bigger headache today if you were in town.
Just saw a policeman use his lights to go through a red light only to turn them off and go to Sonic...
I want to give my boyfriend great head for his birthday...can i practice on you?
she starting giving me head in the taxi..the driver told her to stop..she looked up, said "I'm the birthday girl", and kept on doing what she was doing.
This can't be good. I've realized that I weigh less in the morning after I have had a blackout drunk night than when I work out and eat healthy.
Karaoke into a bottle of boones. dear summer in alabama, glad to see you again.
wait a second. did i just remember you the other night referring to your tits as tia and tamara.....
Our suitemates are shrooming again. I left a less colorful dress hanging on the door, change before you come in because purple is making Maeve cry.
Tim john just told us the story about him losing his virginity at 14 during church on the emergency exit staircase. This is day drinking?
Update. He just picked me up and tried to demonstrate
Trying to take a shit right now to the beat of the fuckin drumcircle outside... It's not goin well
Did you like my voicemail? Sounded like I was being murdered, right?
By a pack of ravenous dildos
Hey, I'm 22. I'm allowed to have a sex life and you're going to hear about it.
Whose dick am I looking at? There are too many possibilities at the moment.
I'm so stoned. We're making Josh's sister bake us brownies. She's so small and pixie like. Her brownies make me cry tears of happy.
I woke up on the damn lawn again...it's not even summer yet
Randomize
