i finally understand why guys leave in the middle of the night.......they got it right
Capitaan dildo arrescate!
Is it bad that Pitbull has taught me more Spanish than high school did?
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
So I'm up to masturbating three times a day, drunk textin my ex, not doing any hw and I've failed half of my tests so far
Sounds better than last semester
A monkey stole my iPod. This was not in the fucking study abroad brochure
Sex tent. say it aloud its amazing. promise you we rnt stoned.
thank god we only have to drink eggnog and rum once a year. It taste like shit.
All I'm saying is that your next houseguest had better not barge in on me in the shower demanding I wash the stolen dye from his hair. I'm not doing that a second time.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
You may now shotgun with the bride
you said you wanted to call me grandma and give me hugs
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
I'm drunk. And I'm alone. Eating chicken fingers in my underwear. I'd say life is grand.
Hey do you remember me?
You were the giant banana I had sex with... how could i forget?
Typical. We're ready to go, and you're not wearing pants.
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