I'm at a party watching some dude try to eat a whole package of Oreos in 5 minutes.
you took out flashcards at the bar and went around asking guys what totalitarianism meant.
Slut skills are useful in every country.
My drug dealer just made me a sandwich at the local deli. Starting to question his street cred.
you convinced the bartender to un-cut you off by letting him touch your boobs whenever you ordered a drink.
I have some memory of taking a dump in a guitar case.
someone just sent me a bong wrapped in christmas paper in the mail. signed 'santa'.
After the concert, I paid a cab to drive me around the city so I could shout "dc highfive!" at everyone who passed for an hour and a half.
You probably don't remember. You were drunk and getting your tits drummed on like haitian bongos in a voodoo ritual.
heres the thing, we have 120 cans of beer left in the fridge. until thats finished we cant fit food in the fridge
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
I remember key bumps, porn and a mom in my bed. Sums up my day.
that is an amazing summary hahaha
I don't understand how these people can do extreme gymnastics and I have problems walking up the stairs.
I'm so sexually frustrated I feel like I'm going to kill my turtle
Made out with some dude at the bar last night. Was fun until he thought bohemian rhapsody was by The Who
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