Houston.. we have a drinking problem..
So. Camera broke because I tried to wash it under the sink, kristi had to take me home and I woke up to my computer showing me that I googled how t take more than one shot at a time. I'd say the night was a success.
Dude has a bag of wine attached to his belt. These guys don't fuck around.
I just got a Community College debit card in the mail. My failure has been materialized.
At what point did we agree that playing bocchi ball on the way to the liquor store was a good idea?
She told me to wait on the sofa while she freshened up. She's been in the bathroom for an hour. I have a bad feeling about this.
Took me 12 hours to be sober again. Shitshow mission accomplished
I'm so pissed my boobs hit the emergency stop button during my workout
Promise me you won't have sex in my room
I can't promise you that, but I promise you that I'll try
Might want to in your tub tho. That thing is fucking huge.
No talking tonight. Just drinking and puking up memories
I've fucked 6 of my brothers' friends. I'm completely fine with him fucking the girl we ate lunch with.
I've come to the conclusion that Jesus and 2013 are haters.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
The more I think about it, the more convinced I am that I'm the solution to all of T-Swift's guy problems.
Okay, but that still doesn't explain all the glitter in my puke.
Randomize
