let's have our labels/stereotypes/careers for each kid by next week.
oh how i love working at summer camp.
Found my sandals in your freezer this morning, THANKS
nah, its part of my diet to keep track of the servings of everything i put into my body
how many servings is brandon's dick?
Literally getting boned by my flask right now. I didn't really think about this whole sneaking past security in a skin tight dress.
By the way, she says hi. At least I think she did since she licked my phone
I just won unlimited hot dogs for life. I'm so glad I smoked
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
The problem with having a roommate is that you are forced to answer the age old question "Are you okay?"
This girl just said she was late for class because she was having sex.
Hi please disregard the last text and if you'd like our entire interaction
Done
BUT DID YOU RIDE THAT DICK INTO THE SUNSET THO?
Hey, I'm just seeing how you're doing and letting you know I fucked your dad last night. Don't fuck with me.
Did you really think putting a napkin over your head would make you giving him a bj less obvious?
hurry up. it's a friday night and i'm drinking in my office by myself. wearing a stewie griffin costume. the cleaning lady is judging me.
Hot or not, she’s from Boston. It’s hard to nut when she sounds like Mark Wahlberg
Randomize
