She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
It's confirmed. We did xmas carol the grocery store across the street from his building at 2:30am... Only the staff was there.
just passed out again, this time at a subway. On a positive not they gave me a free sandwich, pretty sure out pity but at this point i don't care
I know she was blacked out, but she looked directly at the toilet and said "we meet again"
I should start riding the bus again so I can drink all day
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
Under no circumstances is it ok to do naked cartwheels in front of anyone. i don't care how much ecstasy you took
You did a line of free coke with an obese Slovenian unlicensed cab driver in the toilets of the most questionable strip club in the country. New low man.
When you put it like that, I'm inclined to agree.
Rush week is fine, only the t-shirts are white and if it rains, the frat boys in their lawn chairs will be treated to 800 freshmen girls in their first wet tshirt contest.
Welcome to college.
BTW, you ever shave a dick into my dog, I'll cut you. I'll laugh first, but then I'll cut you
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
Like, I just want a guy who will drop what he's doing to come touch my vagina whenever I want and to leave me the hell alone whenever I want. Is that SO MUCH TO ASK??
Are you drunk? You left me a voicemail at 5:59 AM of you making dolphin sounds.
You guys do the cocaine and I'll do the dishes.
Randomize
