Any toy can be an adult toy. Location, location, location.
exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
what is it about summer that misdirects my moral compass so much?
i just did my hair and make up to walk our dogs.. I hate being the single roommate
He told me he finished so fast because he's a sprinter. I hate athletes who are really just pussies.
They thought I was the paid stripper pretty much, and a lady tried to set me up with her nephew and then wanted to get my number for lesbian daughter... A typical night for me
she could've warned me his penis was curved
ya i dont think she expected you to get with her boyfriend.
I'll be spending 4/20 on a cruise ship, so i need a babysitter to make sure I don't reenact Titanic
Just gave some kid head in the library. Perfect way to end the semester.
Dude you're alone at a bar with a woman, and you're talking about my junk?
Going to the u of w I constantly have that moment of, oh hey I felt you up at that rave at folk fest that one time. Winnipeg is too small.
Like, defending PBR and Bio Dome consumes a lot of my time.
He also deemed that the fact that I couldn't log into Netflix was not an emergency. He's wrong.
Nothing says girls night like wine cheese and pregnancy tests 😂
Just remember I’m your roommate with extremely questionable morals
Exactly, what could possibly go wrong
Randomize
