The midget we rented got so drunk last night he got carted off in an ambulance
Thank God for loud music. There is a circus in my butt right now.
some kid came into the principals office and tried to explain what he was sent there for through interpretive dance.
That's what happens when you let Keystone Light make your decisions.
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
He is drunk texting me begging me not to tell my mom. Pretty sure he is about to offer me sexual favors for keeping my mouth shut. I love being the boss's daughter.
Dude...disintegrating condoms. Think about it. For all the guys that wanna go raw dog but their girls won't let them, and for the girls that wanna get pregnant but their guys don't want a kid. What do you think?
I think you've been hitting the soco too hard again.
Not even close. I woke up in the bed of Codys truck. Wrapped up in a sleeping bed, using a stuffed alligator as a pillow. And Alex was laying naked beside me. Not to mention I wasn't wearing the clothes I got there in.
She literally just puked and rallied AT HER OWN WEDDING. Welcome to White Trash town, America.
im the best fifth wheel. all four of them separately bribed me to never speak of what happened last night
Dude. You stood in a corner laughing your ass off while folding clothes, facing the wall. Yes, they were weed brownies..
Sorry I didn't answer your call last night, I was peeing on the driveway.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
All I want to do is shower, but there is a keg in there.
Is it bad that I like to have a guy to flirt with in every class? I feel like it's excellent motivation: to shave, to shower and to show up.
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