I think tequila should come with a little jiminy cricket
The guy in front of me in Sociology is definitely working on my farm in farmville. Never met him before. Do I thank him?
I want someone to please me without me having to show him steps 1 through 5
after we finished, she said she had been a backup performer for Cirque du Soleil. THAT flexible.
You tried to convince our cab driver that your $2 bill was worth $11.70
Just walk-of-shame'd past fifteen little girls at summer camp. Take a good look girls, I am you in twelve years.
should my break up email to my English professor be in MLA format?
It says a lot about how well I know you when I can understand messages of yours that say things like "sauteed Jesus."
I cannot tell if the couch is cold or I spilled beer. THAT kind of night.
library dates and plan B? He is looking like a great catch.
Well I was going to go home but vodka happened.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Boobs have been pretty central in my life somehow lately which makes me question if I am truly gay
We are such grown women, dealing with life's problems one shower beer and reckless makeout session at a time.
Swear on my life the dude next to us just ordered a pizza and I will fight to the death for a slice
Randomize
