Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
just did a line in a complete hula outfit off a chick in a devil costume. do you think hell will be this good?
Omg. Just talked to a semi driver from nebraska. Got her truck stuck. Gave her and her riding buddy a glass of vodka and a cig. YES.
he wanted me to dress up like someone from lord of the rings. I dumped him.
I puked in the coffee maker. I wouldn't make coffee tomorrow morning if I were you
He pretended my clit ring was a door knocker.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
My life is a video game called get the drunk princess back to her castle, thank you to all that participated
Right when he asked me if I was on birth control my dad walked in. This is my fate.
At first it will make you think "how is this physically possible?" and then it will ruin an entire food group for you.
I felt like a slutty ass cruella devil driving your old car, And I got in a fight with your wipers
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
i just really want to fuck a guy wearing lederhosen
it'll be sexier than it sounds, i promise
He literally asked permission to hit on me
How do I tell my boss I have slutty fantasies about him, me and his conference room table?
Randomize
