Don't get me started, it sucks when the one thing you have in common with a girl is not wanting penis inside you.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Fuck, now I'm not only the other woman, but the pregnant one
Rubbed one out while on hold to buy tickets to Disneyland. Feel simultaneously like a freak and strangely productive.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Playing a game in life called "how far can I make a man travel for a booty call"
He was sitting at the table eating ice and said, "I'm pretty sure everyone in my family has nipples."
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
Today's forecast is horny with strong chance of booty calls. Low of Craigslist cruising, and a high of climaxing in a stranger's bed.
I was wondering, is there any way to hook up a lawn hose to a keg?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I went to the obgyn with chipped nail polish.. Somewhere Beyonce was looking down, shaking her head, whispering "Not fierce."
Lol I think I might have been a little aggressive last night there is a blue ass print from your jeans on my wall
And he's in a frat. Everyone in a frat is gay. It's science.
It's not Christmas until you get a photo from an ex wearing a Santa hat and red boxers... And then you just respond with, "nope."
I couldn't find my hair brush so I just brushed my hair with a cat brush. I should not be dating.
found a thong and $20 in my right pocket. it's going to be a good day
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