how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
After we finished he asked if I knew if it was a boy or girl. Diet. Starts. Now.
I cannot believe we're comparing my vagina to Mary Poppins and a black hole.
Might just stay in and drink cuz of the hurricane. Yea I think Wisconsin might be safe but its a good reason to drink.
Literally too hungover to pull out of the driveway. Tried 3 times and failed. I'm going back to bed.
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
For me the most fucked up part of last night was that I know for a fact that you were sober. But your dancing was a close second.
At least you didn't sleep with Ashley's uncle.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I just want to order a very large pizza and get very drunk and very laid.
so after 3 days of looking i found the keg...looks like somebody tried burying behind the garage
got some info she was last seen with some guy wearing goggles
I think I'm more excited for Santa to come now that I made a drinking game out of it
We were talking about kinky shit, and I suggested a hand job in church.
How'd that go over?
Praise the lord and pass the lotion.
Randomize
