You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
Omg. There's def a kid, like 10 years old, sitting in a buggy at wal mart holding a sign that reads "I can't behave"
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
Of course she said it wasn't that good, I don't bring my A game to pity fuck the thrice divorced girl from work
He came in my eye, I lost my earring and all of his friends saw me topless. Happy New Year to you as well.
I may be a little fuzzy on this, but I think at some point I said something about being a generous lover.
All of the sudden your world had become nothing but the sum of visible dicks. Welcome to life.
I already googled the effects of Molly with my antibiotics, I should be fine.
Why is there even a knowledge base for that?!
Sometimes I'm sad but then I realize that bagels.
I know it was a good night because I got a lecture from my roommates mom about stranger danger
Nothing like a dick pic from your fave ex to make you audibly exhale sadly.
Is it normal for a guy to send you a dick pic along with “He misses you”
I miss the pre Covid days when we could meet men in bars. Hitting on guys in the grocery store is just depressing
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