im gay
i know
yea but for you.
I have one thing to say: spongebath.
I wish that wasn't all you had to say. And by that, I mean I wish you hadn't said that at all.
she's not even a shacker, she never made it inside. she's just a porch girl
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
sorry i couldnt make it to your birthday last night. i admit i chose being a whore over you.
Want to get naked in Baltimore this weekend?
He tried to give me a shoulder massage while i peed in the neighbors bushes to "make it more relaxing."... I let him... That drunk
Shoot me. I need tickles, a drink, sushi and a handy
Order is debatable
That's the saddest description of touching yourself I've heard since someone said "I was just lazily rubbing my clitoris while eating Cheetos alone"
If I puke off the kayak tomorrow think nothing of it.
YOU CHEATED ON ME WITH THE WOMAN THAT IS STAYING AT YOUR HOUSE. FORGIVE ME IF IM NOT THINKING YOUR A DEDICATED BOYFRIEND.
so i ran into nick. i may be more gay than anticipated
We learned many a lesson today about drug use in canoes
the worst fight me and my gf ever had was over Guy fieri
I'm like 'WOMAN, YOU'RE 62, RESHEATH THOSE COUGAR CLAWS.'
Randomize