I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I mean, she is a dancer for the Suns. If I didnt fuck her that would just be bad team spirit.
My valentine's day: watching The Notebook, and porn, eating chocolate, and ice cream. All while jacking off.
Wow... you've managed to cover all of the sad girl stereotypes that exist.
This Xanax laced vodka tonic will help me forget that all these spring breakers are all young enough to have been my students.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm playing a game where i judge myself by whats in my cart. Also have 3 bright red giant buckets
I miss your penis. I'm telling you this as a friend, like its just a really great penis. You should be proud of it.
I need to figure out how to tell my doctor that I don't want to fix my possible fertility problems until AFTER I'm done whoring around in my 20s.
currently pooping in a public restroom while drinking free beer. there has never been a finer line between awesome and depressing.
Puuuub goooolf. Being trashed at 830 never felt so right
Dude what hole are you on?....and its 9:15
hole5. 2 under par. irish nachos
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just put an ad on Craigslist for a fake groom... I'm sure only non creepy sane people will respond to it
YOHYFONSO!! YOU ONLY HAVE YOUR FIRST ONE NIGHT STAND ONCE!!
Reasons why I love cats more than people: 1. They're not fucking people.
I feel like emojis are just meant for explaining sex without using words to make anyone uncomfortable. It's a true gift
I'm thinking my boss switched to all cordless keyboards and mouses so that none of us would hang ourselves in the office.
You took a bite of the snack wrap put it down and fell asleep and when you woke up ten minutes later you asked how it got there, dipped it in soda ate it and fell back asleep.
Randomize