I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
just woke up and this girl had my cellphone nestled in the front of her thong. i kept thinking "is this a trap?"
There's an old bald Japanese dude on the metra next to me. He's drinking MGD on a crowded train, and rocking out way too hard to what may be the same Dallas Green song I'm listening to. Life is sweet.
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
i just got so high i needed a buddy system to the kitchen
I don't think there's a better bc pill reminder then when teen mom comes on
the only plus side is that now I'll be able to tell my son not to trust the condoms that his college gives away..........
she carries around a jar of peanut butter. "just in case".
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I just walked into my exam wearing a mans tshirt and Alex's size 13 crocs twenty min late carrying only a pencil and my heels...I'm not real
Alright. I will breast feed the first person to get here.
It was that same situation where "cuddling on the floor" was actually just code for "rough shameful hate sex" hahaha.
Just found $31 in my desk drawer. In $1's. WTF happened last night?!
Just fyi i'm now butt naked in a steam room smoking a bong in some guys house. i sense the weed penetrating my pores.
Its one of those days... someone might die
Would a picture of my dick help?
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