I'm sorry..where i come from learning how to exploit a wealthy middle aged man is a right of passage
I just gave the bartender my number in roman numerals. If she figures it out, she's worth a shot
i find it sad that i can no longer sit in the back of class for fear that someone will fart into the heater again.
I have an excuse to be a whore in Mexico. I'm conducting an experiment to see if small dicks are caused by the poor drinking water.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
My lips are red and swollen. Solid proof that giving head is a viable alternative to lipstick and plumper.
Are the homeless actually allowed to bathe in fountains located on Main Street in downtown Houston? Can Houston TX be so progressive as to condone public bathing?
The "don't have sex with him again" alerts you set on my phone just started going off.
Good. "Seriously, don't do it" should start in about five minutes.
I just need to drink whiskey get off and eat some cheese. Why is that so fucking hard for god to deliver.
best way to lose double chin? blow jobs. I am fucking hurting.
I feel as though I look like a mom with a substance abuse problem
I’m not closing myself off the to the possibility of making a bad life choice.
My favorite part was when you kept telling everyone you were being "green" by drinking straight out of the bottle so u weren't wasting a cup.
just saw a kid waiting at the door of the stairs for the elevator. there is no elevator in this building. get on his level.
you said you didn't feel like drinking anymore so you mixed vodka with your applesauce and ate it
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