apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
i find it depressing how it takes me longer to find a good video compared to the actual jacking off process.
he kept bringing up different times we had sex and i wouldnt say anything back. i would never confirm nor deny the situation...like a politician ya kno
She is wearing lilly and pearls while drinking natty from a monogrammed coozie. If that isn't a sorosititue I don't know what is
I dont care how high you are, meat and sprinkles dont mix dude
It's like God was speaking to me through a penis.
I'm concerned you might be passed out on a random rooftop right now. Not concerned enough to do anything about it. Hope you're alive. Goodnight.
I'm naked and wearing a cowbell.i love med school.
I woke up and he was just feeling up my stomach. I felt like buddha and he was rubbing my belly for good luck. never again.
Oh my goodness please please please my inner slut needs some pampering, shes getting rusty and nothings worse than a rusty slut
I think mark twain said that originally
After sex he cried I didn't know what to do so I patted him on the back and went to the kitchen to make waffles
You're more than welcome to join us! There's red velvet cake and apparently my pants are open for business I didn't consent to this
well i don't NEED my liver but it's nice to have one when you're trying to have a good time
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
You know that we wouldn’t even be talking about all this if you would have kept your candy consumption judgement comments to yourself.
Randomize
