the only reason I knew his name is because half way through I looked up and it was tatooed on his chest.
I told my rommate that he was pissing on his bed. He said "ok man" and took a step backwards and continued. He then went back to bed.
i guess i had fun last thursday night because when i got on the drunk bus this thursday night everyone immediatley started chanting my name and telling me to do a bus flip
whats a bus flip?
idk but apparently i invented it
i ditched last period to have sex with him. i had to change into my skank clothes in the church parking lot. little kids were on the swings.
nothing about this is right.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
we all know badassery is carried on the XX chromosome
You think they'd ask my permission before turning Pajamarama into an orgy. I saw too many of my friends dicks at once the door got kicked down.
are we at that level where i can tell you your girlfriends tits looked really good yet?
You're going to have to buy me a lot of drinks before the bee suit goes on...
At what point did you think the cops were actually coming to hang out with us
You cant hold me accountable for my actions when im high.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just puked up hair, tacos and vodka. Hello Memorial Day weekend.
All i remember was you crying naked on the bathroom floor because you were cold. I got you a blanket and you kept kicking it off and crying because you were still cold.
I'm like a walking PSA for tequila shots
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Slammed 3 beers and just bowled a 129\nI guess alcohol IS the answer
Randomize