hitting rock bottom=girl fakes converting to christianity in order to get out of having sex with you.
ohhhh fuckk. chicks a dude.
I just caught my mom fingering herself in the bathroom...Im moving out.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
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I woke up wearing a cow costume. I'm not even gonna try to recall what happened last night.
I'm sober enough to realize she looks like a man, but drunk enough to do it anyways
My warmest regards to the fish in that koi pond I puked in.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
your love of good penises attached to ugly faces is disgusting and slightly disturbing.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Want to come over and rub aloe on my tits?
tonight were gonna drink champagne and watch girls put themselves in awkward position
I mean thanks for the bj but i wanna forget everything that happened last night between 11 and 5
What do I do when my mom and I both awkwardly spot the Rocky Horror parody porn sitting on the coffee table? Leave it or try to move it?
And I made some girl take out the trash, load and unload the dishwasher, swifter, and clean the counters. So don't act like I don't do anything.
I'm so upset I left my sombrero at the expo center
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