She asked to borrow my chapstick then said "I promise I won't get herpes on it"
he wanted to have me eat skittles off of his body. he mad gay sex even gayer.
your tears are not going to buy me drinks...
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
You came on your own forehead. Just wanted to remind you that.
I have minimal recognition and a lot of burns on my tongue and my vagina hurts.
She pulled out a handful of chest hair. And then gave the room a Brave Heartesque speech.
I wouldn't have puked last night if I didn't inhale straight pepper from you shattering the pepper shaker on the wall.
It took too long for people to come up with things in "never have i ever" so we had to change it to "Don't judge me but.."
My arrest report says I was found in midtown "performing lewd and lascivious acts on top of art meant for public display and enjoyment".
Who the fuck cries when they're stoned?!
Sorry man I just really wanted a McChicken
You're still my best friend even though you continue to pass out on random toilets every time you drink
I'm just gonna put on a documentary and throw up
My hands smell like penis... I can't even remember the last time i touched a penis, but my hands say i did. Oh the mystery.
I love random hookups in covid sex. Usually girls think me about a one and a half to a two and a half but now that I got this mask on I'm a Solid 6.
Randomize
