Dub. In the bra. Dub in the bra.
Hahahhahaha! Oooh get it! Ugh I am so dead but if I go to the lib whuich I will hopefully b havung sex instead, ill hit u up
I have carpet burn on my ass, I'm rethinking my decisions last night.
just when i thought things couldnt get worse, the batteries died in my vibrator.
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Dude its so hot it my room I can't jack off. Its gonna be a long summer.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
Hooking up with him would mean my type has officially become... drug dealer.
What is an appropriate "thanks for saving my life" gift? I don't have any experience with this.
The cab driver doesn't know where we can find an empire state building shaped dildo either!? What is wrong with NYC!?
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
Dude I really need to stop drinking. I chugged a whole bottle of ketchup last night.
i fell out of the car and didnt spill my drink. come overrrr
truly a win in your book
I'm going to book club and then I'm going to get laid. Being in your 20s ain't so bad sometimes.
Randomize
