ashley and jimmy are about to have sex on degrassi.... EVERYONES GETTING LAID BUT ME
Ian has mac and cheese all in his bed/on the wall. Either you did it or he fell asleep with a bowl in his hand and spasmed in his sleep.
Cooked or uncooked?
i hope when i become a housewife i'm more of a gretchen and less of a vicky
last night this guy was hitting on me by showing me the famous people he had in his contacts on his cell... when he asked me if i knew lindsay lohan, i said "whose that? sounds asian"
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
As I was driving her home she congratulated each and every deer we saw for making it through the first day of dear season.
What was the name of the cook I had sex with at Famous Dave's?
Confession: Sometimes I wear my stolen scrubs to the corner store because people will think I'm a doctor and not just a girl too lazy to change out of her pajamas.
We're downstairs cleaning up and she turns to me with these big puppy dog eyes and says "Just so you know, I didn't have sex on your couch". You have to hug that.
You made a course evaluation for your vagina? Wow. You really are a professor now.
She deserves a chance to suck my penis. This is America. Its her God given right.
I'm pretty sure I made out with a guy in a man thong.
You know you threw a brownie at my head last night. And said you did it to defend the turtles honer....
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
After we finish having sex, he smokes an honest to God pipe. It's like fucking a big, sexy Sherlock Holmes...
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