We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
If there's ever a time when I've matured to the point that I don't want to look at camera-phone-titties, go ahead and bury me in a shallow grave by the railroad tracks.
I see you've set aside this special time to humiliate yourself in public.
you should be careful. everyone knows your chances of pregnancy increase by 100 percent when youre the daughter of a religious figure
She wants to practice her harmonica skills on my penis
Confidence is key. All I had to tell him is I'm drinking a bottle of wine and eating chocolate today to celebrate that I love myself. That's how you get a Valentine, my friend.
Concert was great. Tackled the lead singer. Met him afterwards. He was cool about it.
He is asleep with his dick hanging out of my my little pony pajamas. I am required to wake this man up by blowjob
Your sexual fantasies often terrify me but get a pic
It's 3 in the morning and there is a bird chirping it's head off outside. GOD DAMNIT THIS IS NOT A TIME TO SING OF YOUR CHEERFUL BIRD MERRIMENT YOU STUPID BIRD CUNT!
Please send pictures of any nice new years ladies you run across in town, as I've forgotten what women look like.
When's the best time to point out that all of my orgasms this year have been self-administered? Valentine's day?
What did we do lastnight that resulted in a $1,896 charge on my credit card with a $2,000 limit
If not, I can murder my liver twice...it's like a cat, it has 9 lives
i read his ps3 instant messaging thing... he's meeting a guy to have sex. i think your boyfriend's gay
there is another microwave in the elevator.
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