You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
ParTy fuckkin suckkkks bro I gotta fid sum biTch 2 leT me fire sum loadz on her FACE!
?
Nah, but can you imagine if I were seriously like that?
I'm going to write a book about John. It's going to be called big dreams, little dick
you are hot. that is all.
who is this?
the delivery driver from silvermine.
After watching Cinemax for a few months, real porn just grosses me out.
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I mean, it's free alcohol, to turn it down would be a crime against humanity.
just run out there and shit all over the driveway when he comes.. and then point at him
bad sex. bad bad bad. it was like trying to pick up an overcooked noodle with an empty pringles can. why do these guys always seem to find me?
I can't live in this building much longer. People are starting to figure out that it's me making the weird sex noises.
i have an important question...can you drink in jail?
She said, after pronouncing how sober she was, and I quote 'Take this bag, it's so heavy it's like 500 degrees! Wait, is it time to go? Can I run? I think I can run!' Then she ran away.
Hey, I'm sleeping in your car...lol just knock on the window in the morning
Or is it distressingly heterosexual?
tell him if he brings over dinner you might let him see your left boob...or right, whichever you prefer. But under no circumstances do you let him see both...unless he brings a good desert...like coffee ice cream or something
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