Ok I love you more. To infumty and beyong.
do u think i could put an abortion on my debit card?
I definitely managed to work the word "aforementioned" into the conversation.. At least I'm an intelligent sexter.
It was romantic. He brought over a bottle of Jack to celebrate us becoming official on Facebook. Definitely a story for the grandkids.
Your lack of a response has proven you've clearly forgotten how crazy I am.
He thinks he's a sex addict. Just. My. Type.
We found her on the doorstep. Just layin down going, "I made it home!! Aren't you proud??!"
Yup. Can I borrow your penis decanter for my Xmas party on Saturday
I imagine my service panda will provide sufficient protection. At the very least it will be an irresistible cuddly distraction while I make good my escape.
I just had sex on my kitchen counter. It's like the American dream
I left him on his mom's lawn after he passed out in my lap and told me my vagina smells like flowers. Couple of the year award
Alas, I cannot find a male suitor sharing my affinity for sport culture who will both manhandle me and treat me with the respect a young Hillary supporter wants and deserves
First post college job and I got fired within a week. Something tells me that adulthood isn't going to be as much fun as sex and the city led me to believe.
I've got a surprise in the fridge when you get back.
Is it a puppy?
While walking to class I was handed a red bull, condoms, and a mini bible. I love my school.
Randomize
