i may or may not have a boner. what are your thoughts
so I guess it's not okay to mix vodka and ..everything and then proceed to offer a lap dance to ...everyone.
you woke up, pulled a beer bottle out of your pants..took a drink and went back to sleep.
Why is there an empty beer bottle in the shower?
Why wouldn't there be.
i will see naked twins by the end of the night. that's all i know
the room spins SO much faster in panama
You were running around yelling "BUKAKE!" and squirting people with a shampoo bottle you found. Total shitshow.
I have too much respect and admiration for my dick to put it into a situation where he could possibly be killed
You tried to fight everyone, so we kept having her take her shirt off. You were sufficiently distracted...
My dad just told me I can't passout in the driveway after the 4th of July parade this year, again
I just kept thinking.. Holy shit. We're fucking in my front yard.
We got really high and he took a green marker and made my vagina into a Christmas tree.
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
I had no plans to sleep with him, but he had to stay because of the snow. I always say, don't look a gift storm in the mouth.
The day will come again young grasshopper. For now you must complete your training of patience and tongue biting
Randomize
