wait, did i just see you litter out your window??
umm, i have a hybrid. it cancels out.
Question: does he have any sense of self image? He looks slightly like he crawled out of the Euphrates after living as a fish for 20 years
His parents had a bottle of captain morgan on the table for me when I went for dinner. I feel accepted
we agreed that it was acceptable to get the cat high as long as we gave her a lot of food.
Sorry I sent so many blank messages. My hands are slippery. Don't ask why.
There are too many people and smells in this elevator for my hangover to handle.
He gave up on mugging us when Dave wouldn't stop laughing. He was wiggling his finger at the knife and making baby noises and giggling. The guy just walked away.
She came to the party with six kegs and a life sized portrait of Lavar Burton. SHE WILL BE MY WIFE.
I may have farted on a group of children. It may not have been an accident.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Xanax and cookies, it's good to be home
You can't die you're my only democrat family member
Had a dream last night that we survived the apocalypse. And we celebrated Christmas.
What did I get you?
A 12 gauge and a bottle of vodka that was waist high.
Sounds about right
i walked into her house and she introduced me to her family. i dont think she understands the term booty call
I currently don't understand fingers.
Randomize
