WHY DIDN'T ANYON E TELL ME SHE WAS SIXTEEN
She told me that she faked her orgasm. Does she think I care??
He's coming over tonight...I really wish I didn't have my period right now...
I believe I'm witnessing the first time ever that you wished your period would NOT come....
It took us hanging out like four times to kiss. Id like to fuck you before I'm 30
I saw someone get arrested while I was moving out...this has to be a good sign.
He will not just "come" out of the closet. He will fall out, 69ing me, with two fingers in his starving asshole, wearing cum splattered lady gaga sunglasses, weeping.
That was the greatest thing i have ever read.
What was the name of that place where we saw that concert? It was like a warehouse and some guy was living in the loft above the stage...
It's called: a legit place to drop acid.
You had me at "mimosas" several texts ago.
If Boring and Monotone had a love child, it would be this guy.
Do you ever just feel the storm building inside of you that tells you you're ready for a giant indiscriminate fuckfest?
I mean, I'm shallow, narcissistic, and selfish, but I'm an amazing friend sometimes
sexting just seems like too much work right now.
IF THE SUNS NOT EVEN OUT THEN WHY IS HIS DICK OUT WTF
Abby there's no shame in reading porn. It takes more work than watching I suppose
She complained to dominos last night for hanging up on her, and then she wrote "fuck you dominos" on the receipt when we got our pizza
So we are banned from the campus dominos
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