True but thats because hes a fetus.
Ok never mind. Thought i pooped my pants for a second. False alarm.
I asked my mom, she said yes...but you have to shower with grandpa.
I just saw a homeless man dressed as a pirate. I love san francisco.
I wish "capable of destroying an innocent girl's life" is something I could put on my resume
I just used my thong as a hair tie. I think I reached my limit.
its coolsest when we hear the beat in our water bottles. and the likghts are in his eyes now. oh holland
Apparently I took one a huge picture off the wall at the bar and was walking around dancing with it..
I am dressed. And we didn't do anything. He's gorgeous and tall tho. Something nice to look at when I'm hungover
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I think your high point was when the quesadilla was in your mouth and you were screaming "I can't chew!" and the Taco Bell guy just kinda stared at you like he wanted to strangle.
I've now spilled wine and got poptarts all over my cast. So much for my doc taking me seriously...
ted dressed as a cardinal led an expedition across campus. i felt like one of the 12 apostles.
Listen I just pulled white girl hair out of my underwear. This has got to stop. I was wearing pants all night.
My roommate wasn't home and I was too drunk and tired so I peed in the trash can. Twice.
Randomize
