Either I'm losing my touch or ED is running rampant in 20 something men now
HE HAS A CHODE. LIFE IS NOT GOING TO BE EASY FOR HIM.
I'd rather make snow angels in a pool of elephant shit.than sleep with him.
My ex was there, the 2 girls I'm seeing showed up and I had a pocket full of VIP passes 2 the strip club. Had all the makings of an epic night but I fell asleep at the bar.
Lol i have proven this trip that I can meet a chick and fuck her within 72 hours no matter where she lives
The cop told us he we helped him pass his monthly bong quota. He almost ran out of room on the hood of his car..
I can only use one eye at a time. And if I want to listen, I have to close both of them.
I can always see lesbian subplot. It's my hero ability.
in a last ditch attempt to make life awkward after i die today i want to be buried naked and have an open casket funeral.
I think everyone, including the amish, know who you are after this weekend.
You are a super loving wife. But did you, at any point since Thanksgiving, slip me half your bottle of stool softeners?
Dave is getting a lap dance to the venga boys
this is not a drill
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
Only you would offer whiskey to a man in liver failure.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
Randomize
