The Worst (noun)- 1. Getting up at 6am after a night of drinking. 2. Wearing a Peter Rabbit costume.
clay aiken is like melissa ehteridge without the guitar.
i just had sex bonerless
i found you on the dancefloor with your cell phone to your ear saying that you didn't like the music they played at the club so you were going to listen to your own
I said make yourselves at home, not to put a used condom on my ceiling fan.
Ia nefed hefelkp i am a taxi
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
It's just one of those nights that , as long as you have the drugs, everything is going to be alright.
I an in a belgian bar and i cant understand shit. Trying to talk to strangers. Getting drunk until we all speak the same language. Brace for updates.
At least one of us had a weekend full of money and dick
I feel like vibrating beds are just synonymous with venereal diseases.
When did it become normal to wake up in the middle of the night to take a group bathroom break and have a 10 minute discussion on where the next football game is?
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
Spent tonight painting strippers in camo.
Did u guys seriously make a betting pool on when im going to get pregnant???
Yep, wanna bid?
Randomize
