I just did your MASH and your life is pretty unfortunate. Youre marrying the tech guy for love. you live in a shack and you're a hooker and you make $1 a day. you drive a brown limo and you have 7 kids
have fun at tinkers! p.s. are there any hot guys who look like they wanna wait until marriage to have sex?
what, no i told him that it wasnt nessesary to put all 5 fingers in my vagina
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
apparently vodka and oj turns green when you throw it up
basic color theory
I just found ouut you can get a DUI in a kayak. Fuck.
i cant text you anymore tonight, God gave me two hands for two cups
Join us. We're on the roof drinking breakfast
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Meet at Walmart straight from work to buy items for hurricane fun. Then blast some wine, make some sex, blast a bowl and cuddle each other till the sun comes up?
That's the most romantic New Orleans hurrication I've ever heard of. Can I have your babies?
I'm going to sleep with this bank teller and I'm going to enjoy it, just try and stop me
I'm pretty sure my munchies are the only reason Good and Plenty is still around
The guy I hooked up with last night left me alone with his dog AND IT JUST SHIT ON THE FLOOR. WHAT DO I DO
I said "one day" and that day is not today
It's routine now. He comes home from work and i ride him like a cowgirl with only a few sips of wine. I love being his neighbor.
Randomize
