Everyone needs a good pregnancy scare in their life.
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
Any time you start making pro wrestling references before 10 PM I know that I'm breaking up a fight between you and some muscled up frat boy you call Hogan.
laughing at 16 and pregnant while fucking w/o a condom....
i always knew you were classy
Just got blown on the bus in front of abot 20 ppl. Lots of high fives.
You told him you loved him!?
I mean if he translated "Zi luve ku" as that then yes.
It was honestly like he was directing a porno or something. he kept telling different people to grab other people's boobs, it was all very artistic.
Because he's your one night stand I shouldn't feel obligated to extend social media to him
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
Apparently I walked to Denny's in the pouring rain without shoes just socks last night. Excellent.
I was just laughing and almost crying after I orgasmed, and then almost crying because I was laughing so hard. That's new.
Does he think you're psycho?
Officially...... yes.
So I deleted all the text from my phone, was looking for my mom's coffee order and show the coffee guy the pic of me eating pussy.
Fucked him in his sketchy van in the Applebee's parking lot. In other news, my dry spell is over.
I tried to text you about going to the Lion's Den but sent it to my boss. She was down for it. Please advise.
I was legit late to work one day Bc it took me so long to get a good nude
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