I wish life had little blips of pornography
new low, shannon just screamed FUCK THE IRISH to a 10 year old's face then proceeded to throw a hotdog at his parents. I think its time i take her home.
its like the voldemort of pregnancies, we don't talk about it
I just went to a chocolate syrup wrestling party I think you need to get on my level
he yelled "RELEASE THE KRAKEN" then hit me with his dick
looking back, maybe 11 flaming dr peppers was a little extreme
and his room smelled like strippers, childrens tears, and fear
I woke up spooning my guard tube. Tell me I'm not the most dedicated lifeguard ever
I ate a pepperoni off of someone's floor last night. We need to talk.
I just commented on the education level of his penis.
Curdled. you forgot that word. It was a curdled buttery nipple shot.
Yeah I was thinking something along the lines of "I almost died, lets celebrate with sex. Come over"
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
They just canceled the season. It’s going to be harder to bang soccer moms this year
I didn’t say it was classy, I said it was sexy
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