Yeah....I really appreciate it....I didn't even get it from hooking up....lame, atleast if a girl gets u sick when u r hooking up it was fun in its inception...
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
Just had perfomance review. I was told the best example of my integrity was when I told my boss I was going to fail the random drug test due to my weekend coke binge. She said that took a lot of character.
I buy you gas. You blow me. Economics.
They gave me a glowstick necklace to wear so they could locate me if I wandered off into the woods
There's nothing I can say to make me pepper spraying you any better
if that blanket by the dog bowl was your dog's "bed" then i apologize to bailey for having sex on it
I fell asleep with all the lights and heat on in the apartment with windows open, Earth Hour is lost on people like me.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
Sure go ahead and start this 'business' with him...just don't come crying to me when you have to fake your own death in two years
We grabbed as many adult diapers as we could and made a run for it.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
WHERE THE FUCK IS MY ARM DO YOU HAVE ANY IDEA HOW DIFFICULT IS IS TO TYPE WITH ONE HAND
You told him he “could park his dick in your garage”.
Well he didn’t. It shouldn’t be this hard to get a penis.
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