Honestly I wish you never came into my life. I know I don't want you. But I keep trying to get you back bc of the memories
I don't see you I see the memories. All the time
I am not drunk. I will recite the pledge.
I don't want you to recite the pledge!
Pledge alligien to america to united states of america
I JUST GOT MY PERIOD AND MY VISA FOR LONDON GOT APPROVED! BEST DAY EVER!
I think I have swimmer's ear. From his tongue.
just gave a homeless man a kiss in exchange for two handles
exact location. now.
My family just suggested tequila shots. I had Vietnam style flashbacks.
When did we start counting Thursdays as weekends?
When we got our fake ids in grade 11, why?
I just feel like it's time to start counting wednesdays as well...
that would be two times in a week with two different guys.
they have the same name so it only counts as one guy right?
Best oral ever, hands down so to speak. but I'm starting to want to meet that lesbian truck driver he says he's better than. Just for comparison purposes of course.
He is peeing inside and sticking up for himself. Those are two of the four signs of the apocalypse.
Whenever I think to myself, "I don't work for a bunch of hours"... It's shot time?
You just kept stroking his beard and thinking aloud that you wanted to rub your face all over it.
Gotta get new sheets. ..I fucked the satin off mine.
You couldn't even walk but you came into the kitchen with the funnel and begged me to put beer in it
We're going to get naked and build a fort instead. HAPPY NEW YEAR!
Randomize
